TAKING STOCK

I have heard it said
That the eyes are the mirrors of the soul.

I think that's true.
You can tell if a person is wounded or whole.

When I was 6 weeks old,
My smile was crooked,
And I looked soft, and new.....

When I was six
All things were possible –
And heartache was not
Something that I knew.

At 18, I was not yet aware
That I would not become a nurse.
My smile is wide
My face is open, And unafraid.
My mistakes were, as yet, unmade.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At 21, my photograph
Filled me with pride.
I was about to become his bride.

By 26, I had waited for my husband to come home
From war;
Only to be divorced before our son was four.
I raised my son alone.
I notice that the light in my eyes is dim
Whereas before, they shone.

Someone said:
I have never seen eyes so sad.
He didn't mean to make me feel so bad.

By 30, I was way past the divorce,
Happy again,
Dancing my way from New Jersey to New York,
Disco-dancing thru milling crowds of men.

At 33, I think I look my best.
I laugh and work, dance, raise my son,
And wonder where his babyhood went.
I am content.

By 39, my son has made me "The ArmyMom"
The eyes seem accepting
And oddly calm.

At 53, all is well with my world.
I've been remarried for 13 years.
I'm a happy girl.

When I was 56,
he said he wanted out.
We'd been married 16 years.

It squeezed my heart
and nearly crushed me;
I cried a million tears.

And as late as just last year
I think I still felt grief........

I look so sad, and tired.
It's hard work trying to look happy
when you are mired
in disbelief.

At 57, having been dealt the second blow
my face is smiling
but my eyes say "no"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At 58, I smile at Christmas.
My face is fuller
And I'm getting wrinkly.......
But my eyes say I'm healing
And the smile is crinkly.

I have spent some time today
Looking into my eyes.

And the Reflections there
Give me no great surprise.

I have been happy and I have been sad.
I have been content and filled with deep despair.

I have loved my life
And the people in it.

As for peace,
I'm getting there.

Awarded October 19, 2005

TAKING STOCK

©Copyright October 18, 2005 by Christina