Army Mom’s Safe Haven

PERHAPS
(For Michael)

Perhaps I have loved
you too much
I have reached across
oceans in order to touch

you in some way,
in some fashion...
because you were
my only passion.

Perhaps I have been
at times, so concerned,
that the place where
I touched you was raw
and burned.

I have loved you
in the only way that
I knew how.
I find I should try explaining, now...

No one else can understand
that when a child leaves
you can no longer hold his hand,
and the loneliness is sometimes
hard to bear
when you can't be there.

Some children go
farther than others
Some remain close
to their mothers.......

some hold her in their
heart
but don't keep in contact
while they are apart.......

Perhaps I have loved you too much
I still long for your voice
and your touch -
your hug, your smile,
a confidence once in awhile

Perhaps my love has
pushed you away
Maybe you don't believe
anything I say
Perhaps you think I have
betrayed your trust
It isn't so.
Sometimes the child hands down
a sentence that isn't fair, or just.

Someday, your child will walk away.
I pray that he will stay in touch
and that you will not wonder
what you did, or if you loved him
too little, or too much.

I would defend you
to the death
I would say I love you
with my dying breath ~

I prayed for happiness for you
A good, productive life, good friends,
happy holidays,
lots of smiles, and no tears
Satisfaction in the coming years.

If you ever need a shoulder
If you ever need to cry,
you can lean on me
and I will not ask you why.

So, I must share with you now,
as one who has lost her mother;
that, at my life's end,
whether I was right or wrong
I will have loved you as no other.

©Copyright April 7, 2007 by Christina