Army Mom’s Safe Haven

Christina: Shadows, Shame, and Solace


like nightmares
visit me in the night
I used to love the dark
now I look for light
sometimes I am trapped
sometimes I can't move
I'm too tightly wrapped -
Sometimes I wake up
eyes streaming with tears
things of past years.
Sometimes my mother sits on my bed
I never remember the
words that she's said
I get the sense
that all will be fine;
my grandfather appears
sweet dream
singularly mine.
I used to dream
I was a soldier who'd died
and only woke up after
I'd cried.
I was only ten
Another dream
Round and round in
a concrete bunker
I run and I scream
they're each shooting
at me, each with a gun;
while I run -
I never win,
I've died over and over
and over again.
Great dreams of flight
I fly far and high
I wake up elated
and don't question why.

Sweet dreams of Michael;
and mother and dad
now in the past.
Things I wish I hadn't
said, regrets for some things
when time didn't last.
Solace in Tristan
I see his face when I
turn out the light
when I'm afraid of the
darkness and
don't like the night.
and Shame,
and Solace at night
Nightmares and
Flight -
Movies I watch
when I sleep
in the Night.

©Copyright October 29, 2003 by Christina